A while back, I heard a commercial for a local community college that went like this: “Eight hours a day, 5 days a week: I hated my job!” Can you imagine? That’s 40 solid hours in a single week, Internet. Who lives like this? In other news, whoever came to our house and unalphabetized the [...]
One of my coworkers, who is allergic to wheat, is always talking about how we put a man on the moon, yet no one has managed to make a rice-flour bagel. To which I say: we put a man on the moon, yet no one has figured out how to make all of my Ritz [...]
Yesterday marked the one-year anniversary of the second-happiest day of my mom’s life, the first of course being the day I was born: Stephan and I got married! To each other! In the long, long year since, we have taken to referring to any decision we have made or can otherwise take credit for as [...]
Like most Americans, I like England. When I was in college, I took a history of England class, during which a future President of the United States (2032) once cheated off my midterm. I am now discovering, however, that my formal English education was incomplete. For instance, I have no idea what kinds of berries [...]
